how do you expect me to do a homework assignment that requires a computer
do you know what happens when i get near a computer
I have looked at you
in millions of ways and
I have loved you in each
Haiku (via komakino)
STOP. This is the police, you’re under arrest for being too cute. Now, put your hands where I can hold them.
i wanna be a reverse tooth fairy where i rob people and then scatter human teeth on their bed
i dont know what your dentist is doing to you but i think you need to go to the police
IT MAKES ME REALLY HAPPY WHEN PEOPLE REFER TO ME AS THEIR FRIEND WHOA. FRIEND
MAYBE if u didn’t want ur son to EAT poeple u shouldnt have named him something that rhymes with cannibal u should have name him hegetarian or something
one time my religion teacher who has a monobrow asked me “what the hell did you do to your hair?” because i had a blonde streak through it and i said “what the hell did you do to your eyebrow” and he sent me outside
when i came back in he asked everyone what monotheism was and i said it meant a religion that worshiped one god because mono means one as in monobrow and he sent me out again
YOU KNOW WHAT? I REALIZED, THERE’S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST SPENDING YOUR DAYS IN FRONT OF THE COMPUTER, CHECKING OUT TUMBLR. FROM NOW ON I’M NOT GOING TO WASTE MY LIFE ON THE COMPUTER!
*opens tumblr app on mobile*